You can grow flowers from where dirt used to be

Jessy, 18, Germany. This blog contains:
Personal, My Face, ,
My Singing and the rest is all coffee, fashion, vintage and basically my brain summarized in a blog. I hope you enjoy it.

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I hate my phone camera quality, but this was an amazing end to an amazing day!

I spent three days at my favourite lake with some of my favourite people and a beautiful sunny night at one of the most breathtalking places I know and right now I just sit here, revising my last days, watching the rain pour and I honestly couldn’t be happier.

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I just really miss hot days at this place.

I’m the happiest most excited person on earth right now… oh my god! Life’s wonderful right now!

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I really craved for coffee so I decided to brew myself some excellent caramel latte with a double shot espresso although it’s almost 9pm. Usually coffein does nothing to me because I’ve been a coffee junkie since forever. But right now I feel so jittery and hyper and.. ooops this is going to be a long night.

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I realised that future me won’t be proud looking back knowing that me and my happiness were so dependent on one person. And once I knew I would regret not doing it now letting go was so much easier.

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Off to Spain!

My lovelies, I’m going to fly to Spain tomorrow, which is why you won’t hear or see of me on your dash for at least a week. (not quite sure if I’ll queue some stuff or not) I hope you have a great week! Byyyyyeeeeee!

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Abi Abi Abi Abitur! Officially finished school yesterday! With amazing 1,9!! I even got an A in maths! An A! In maths! Sadly I was only able to celebrate until 10pm because my bestie got me sick, yay! Yet: I am so happy! Sick, but happy!

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I’m going to have my A-Level 5 hour long German test tomorrow and I already feel so terrible just thinking about it. ugh.

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Anonymous: I hope the 'Talk about'-list is still a thing? I'm curious! ;-) 5, 14, 15, 16, 24, 32! This is quite a lot, but they're all so positive and sweet and I thought you could use that! Looking forward to your answers! xx

Awwww, first of all: Thank you very, very much! Knowing that there are people out there who take their time to scroll through my blog, search for nice things to ask, write me because they’re curious about me as a person and even care about my well-being is such a wonderful thing to know. It doesn’t matter if I know you in person, if we write here on the regular or you’re just a stranger passing by, this really means a lot! Okay, so here we go:

5: Talk about the best birthday you’ve had.
That’s a really nice one, indeed! Uhm, I think they were all pretty cool, but I really loved my 16th and my 18th Birthday. Not just because they’re such big steps towards becoming a grown-up (being able to go out and enjoy beer and ‘ligh’ alcohol with 16 and being able to do ”everything” as soon as you turned 18 here in Germany), but also thanks to my friends and family. But my absolute favourite was probably when I turned 6, because I remember that I got this gorgeous Cinderalla pumpkin carriage for my Barbies and playing with it brought me so much joy and I don’t even know why, but this moment of me sitting in the living room playing with this carriage is really etched upon my memory. It was a really happy moment.

14: Talk about a vacation.
Last summer me, my best friend and two other friends drove to my best friend’s ”summer vacation house” in Italy and it was a really wonderful week. We biked to the beach every know and then, we simply enjoyed being absolutely lazy in the sun, we drove to Bibione and Lignano for shopping trips and amazing dinners. It was such a great, fightless, stressless, relaxing week and so many memories that I will never forget. On the first night for example we just went to the haven that was about 5-10min away, grabbed some ice cream and sat on the base, chatted and looked at the stars above and the sea in front of us. A really beautiful vacation.

15: Talk about the time you were most content in life.
Spring last year, I guess. I just seriously had some wonderful days, probably some may have been the best days of my life that will be kept in my mind forever. Everything was so free, careless and I was just so happy. I had so many practices for my Musical with the people I’ve been closest with around that time, the weather was sunny and perfect most of the time, I enjoyed that my two besties had vespas with which we’ve been constantly on the road. I will never forget April 14th, the day when my former Musical partner and me decided to spontaneously drive to Stuttgart and how I fell in love with this beautiful city that day and how I’ve never before had such a stomach ache from laughing that much like that day and how we wished for ”I Want It That Way” at a radio station and they played ”Everybody” instead, but we still jammed out so hard. And how a friend of ours heard it on the radio and called us out for it and how I couldn’t stop laughing about it. I will never forget this absolutely breathtakingly hotel with this cute café in baroque style we’ve been to and how me and my best friend enjoyed Shopping Week Sale that day. I will never forget the inside jokes we’ve made that day and how I’ve had my best friend’s favourite cake at her house later and how we’ve then went to a wonderful friend of mine, where we played UNO with way too many self-invented rules and about the same amount of vodka. How I secretly let all of my cards fall down to the ground until someone finally realised it and called me out and how we couldn’t stop laughing about it. How I was so drunk, but in a very good and ‘not-feeling-sick’ way, that I slept in my friend’s bed and in the same clothes I’ve worn all day. I probably will never forget the words I’ve said to my (really drunk) friend right before I went to bed: “Do you know these days, where everything is so perfect and wonderful that at the end of it you’re not even sure if it all happened? Today happened more than in months. Please don’t ever let me forget this day, okay?” (Side Note: After this very poetic moment she started throwing up.) My best friend caught me up the next morning, because we’ve had Musical practice and I had to spend half of the day in those clothes because I wasn’t able to change. And of course I will never ever forget April 17th, the day I was able to finally play Audrey on the stage in front of a sold out crowd, which was definetely one of the best days of my life. I was really content throughout spring and summer 2013. Always so nice to remember this time.

16: Talk about the best party you’ve ever been to.
Haha, I guess Despo Party 2012. Seriously almost every girl I’ve kind of been close to or considered somehow a friend of mine was at this party. I don’t think I ever was that ”perfectly” drunk and I also don’t think that I’ve ever danced that much. It was the perfect girls night and since we’ve been the first ones to arrive (we were 17, what do you expect? We weren’t the cool kids yet and wanted to have most of the night) we had this entire area with couches and tables for us exclusively. You’ve had the same sound quality as on the dance floor, which was why this area was our own private dancefloor. As soon as you sat down to breathe a bit a girl took you by the hands and began dancing with you all over again. I don’t even know how I did it this night, because the heels I was wearing all night are not even comfortable to stand in! It was an absolutely perfect night because we were all together with barely anyone missing and whenever I see photos of that night I can’t help but smile widely.

24: Talk about something someone told you that meant a lot.
"So what? I could lose them all. Doesn’t matter as long as we’ve got us, right? I’d give away all of my friends for a friend like you though." Something my best friend said last year during a fight with a close friend of ours. She also said something similar some weeks ago. This is just one of the most wonderful things to hear.

32: Talk about a place you remember from your childhood.
Our great, big garden we used to have back in the house we’ve lived before. It was perfect and I knew no one who had such a great garden like we did. Whenever I think of my childhood I think that no child could possibly grow up in a better environment than I did and that I can be so endlessly thankful for a wonderful enourmos orchad with 5 different apple trees and the biggest cherry tree I’ve seen in my life (it was about 100 years old), a big flower meadow in front of the house with a cute little summer house in which we used to play hide and seek, the long gateway in which I’ve learnt to ride my bike and all the neighbour’s cats that I’ve loved so much. This garden was the perfect place in my childhood. I remember planting flowers with my grandma when I was 4. I remember the barbecue we’ve had when I was 5 and so sick, that I had to lie on a sunlounger in a warm blanket and everyone took care of me and I was so happy though. I remember so many things about this place. It was truly magic. :)

Dear lord, that took me a while, but it was so lovely to remember all those good things. Thank you so much, anon. Whoever you were! xxxx

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